Assorted Jelly Beans - s/t

Before I begin, I must make clear that by sharing this album is not an attempt to convert you to an Assorted Jelly Beans fan, but simply a fan of this album. This is because everything else these guys ever recorded is terrible.
Here's a brief interaction with Mitch Clem on his now deceased forum:
Mitch: Assorted Jelly Beans first album is great; hornless ska-punk that sounds like the Beastie Boys playing Operation Ivy.
Me: Is anything else they did any good? I really love that album
Mitch: NO. Everything else they did sounds like an experiment to see how shitty a band could become before imploding
Me: oh.
I later tossed away this sagely advice in favor of forming my own opinion on the band's remaining catalog, and honestly, I'm probably worse for it. Y'know the age old phrase "ska-punk bands shouldn't attempt to hybridize with hip-hop"? Alright.
So anyway, Assorted Jelly Beans were an awesome ska-punk/ska-core/third wave 3-piece from California who did indeed sound similar to "the Beastie Boys play[ing] Operation Ivy". Their self-titled album was the first release from a few members of The Vandals' label - Kung Fu Records - in '96. Apparently, this actually sold 25K copies upon release, which seems fucking bizarre to me considering how little commercial potential these guys had. I guess it was the golden age of ska-punk, though... not that this would've appealed to a lot of Christian teens what with the cussin' and drug references.
That was my hilarious sweeping generalization of all Christian teens.
...but let me elaborate on the fact that I followed up a declaration of disdain for their later, more hip-hop-influenced material with a reiteration that they sound like a hip-hop group playing ska: it's the snotty, dual white kid vocalists that draw the parallel, not the music, exactly. I've never been a big Beastie Boys fan, but Assorted Jelly Beans' approximation of their sarcastic, self-parodying smart-assery elevates this disc way above what it would be with a more standard punk dude on the mic, and I definitely don't mean to belittle the riffage present. It's just that the vocals just sound so secure and confident in their ridiculousness that I can't help but love them. The songs are tight as hell, catchy, non-generic, and completely non-cheesy, making this one of the very few ska-punk albums I can listen to when I'm not in a skankin' mood aka close to accepting Skankin' Pickle as anything less than "dorky bullshit". I'm not sure I could pick stand outs, since every track is excellent, but "Braindead", "In Our Eyes", "Punk Rock Jock", and "Doobage" are likely my favorites of the bunch.
CHECK OUT THE PROFUNDITY:

"MY LIFE REVOLVES A-ROUND
BUYING AN OUNCE OR P-P-P-P-P-P-POUND"

This stuff truly heals the battered soul.

http://www.mediafire.com/?3ggkbmuyxy2

Common Rider - Last Wave Rockers

If you managed to slog your way through that botched mess of an Operation Ivy review, you may have uncovered that I not only enjoy Operation Ivy, but moreover, the heroics of one Jesse Michaels. That is, unless I didn't even mention my fandom for Jesse Michaels in said review. I really don't feel like going back to re-read it, so let's assume I did mention it for the sake of the present review's continuation. So yeah, while I love Energy and have listened to it countless times, I'm gonna have to be cOnTrOvErSiAl and state that the ditty to our left blows anything Op. Ivy ever did completely outta the water.
Common Rider was Jesse Michael's third musical unit following the dissolution of the short lived Big Rig, who released one 9 minute EP in '94 and split up two years later. Last Wave Rockers debuted in '99, and sounds like the logical next step into maturity as far as ska-punk songwriting is concerned. The tempo is slowed, the melodies are far more developed and poppy, and the ska has been upgraded into rocksteady. This is one of the few albums I can think of that has a lot of variation from track to track without ever losing an ounce of cohesion. All the songs have such a relaxed, confident, feeling, and sound like they've been practiced and trimmed down hundreds of times, performed with nothing to prove to the audience but all the energy and vivacity that comes with that disposition. I don't know if that'll translate to anyone reading this, but that's about as perfect of a description I can muster. The production is clean-as-a-sterilized-object (catchy!), and every instrument sounds perfectly crisp and balanced, with Jesse's lyrics spat out with incredible rhythm and cadence. The hammond organ and sax bits definitely add to the disc's overall warmth, especially on tracks like "Carry On" and "Walk Down The River", as well as Heather from the "eh, alright" Teen Idols' back up vocals on a handful of tracks.
I've probably listened to this album well over a hundred times since I picked it up, so I can say with no doubt that if there's any flaws here, I haven't been capable of spotting them. Every track is extremely accessible and well-written, but here's one I've heard a lot of positive feedback on:

If I had to choose my three favorite songs on here, I'd probably have to go with pop punk-y "True Rulers", the closer "Dixie Roadrash", and the adorable "Deep Spring", which sounds almost nothing like the rest of the album, but still fits in perfectly. I've easily played the latter a zillion times, but I have to stress how difficult it is to just pick 3. Or even 6 would be harsh. The whole thing is really that good. Without further ado:

http://www.mediafire.com/?k5zgynjwzdt

These guys would go on to record one more full length, an EP with Billie Joe from Green Day on guitar, and a split EP with Against All Authority before calling it quits in 2003. All of them have their merits and are worth checking out (especially This Is Unity Music), but from my perspective, none of them could've possibly topped this. Jesse Michaels finally has another band together named for the opening track on this album, "Classics Of Love", but play in a more rock-oriented vein than the preceding stuff. I'll probably cover that and the aforementioned Big Rig EP in a future post...

Operation Ivy - Energy

Just in case you didn't know: Energy is the name of the original 19 song LP from '89. The self-titled is the '91 reissue combining Energy with 1988's Hectic EP and the tracks from Maximumrocknroll's Turn It Around! compilation. Now that that's off the table, let's talk about the left hand corner's resident .jpeg image:

It might seem a little redundant to cover such a well known, ridiculously influential classic like Operation Ivy's sole LP, but whatever, I really, really, love this album and felt like talking about it. In fact, along with Slapstick's Lookit!, Gangster Fun's Time Flies When You're Gangster Fun, and Blue Meanies' Kiss Your Ass Goodbye, this album finally got me to pull the thorn of prejudice against ska-punk out of my side and embrace the complete whitewashing of a black originated genre. But hey, those are the absolute essentials of growing up, so we don't need to go into any more detail. Also: obligatory joke about ska's role in Christian youth in the 90's.

A lot of people refer to songs like "Knowledge", "Unity", "The Crowd", and "Caution" as Operation Ivy's classics, and while I'd agree that those are incredible tracks, the amount of praise heaped upon them sorta downplays the greatness of the rest of the album. There really isn't a single bad or even mediocre song here, and "Missionary" is probably one of the all time best closers - in league with "The Nautical Mile" and "Postures (Leave Your Body Behind)" as far as personal favorites go. I figure I don't really need to painstakingly describe these guys' sound if you stumbled upon this blog, but it's basically a mix of roughly produced East Bay pop punk and speedy ska guitar, the occasional horn, and vocal interplay provided by all four members (with Jesse Michaels at the helm, of course).
Man, do I not sound excited to be reviewing this. Try to ignore that please, I'm tired. I always take way too fuckin' long writing these entries and end up completely wiped out by the end and my writing gets slack as hell. Maybe blow up some balloons and throw confetti while you read it to synthesize my enthusiasm for this album.
Here:

http://www.mediafire.com/?nsxulenn0ue

I know ska is about as fashionable as pastel track pants nowadays, but if you somehow haven't heard this yet, give it a shot or two before you write it off. As far as the genre goes, this is it's masterpiece, and one of the most compulsively listenable albums I can think of. I'll probably cover this in a future post, but check out Jesse Michael's second full fledged band while you're at it - Common Rider. Their debut, Last Wave Rockers, is something I've probably spun more times than what could be considered healthy.