Knuckle Scraper - Max Isn't The Bastard

You've probably seen this already, but I still think it's pretty amusing stuff:

http://stereogum.com/931251/man-is-the-bastard-disses-akronfamily/franchises/wheres-the-beef/

This comment in particular deserves to be pointed out:
"First they came for the No Age, and I did not speak out, because I was not a No Age. Then they came for the Joy Division, but I did not speak out, because I was not a Joy Division. Then they came for the Man Is The Bastard, and I did not speak out, because I was not a Man Is The Bastard. Then they came for me, and there was nobody left to copyright my t-shirt"
To be honest, I actually really love it when bands pay blatant homage to their influences/heroes in their artwork, t-shirts, and song titles. Perhaps not "Fiend Club" Melvins t-shirt levels of blatancy or the Black Flag "bars" pairing with literally every word couplet in existence, but I can definitely appreciate stuff like that DK font Dear Landlord hoodie and the Mammoth Grinder Goes To College demo. Such fetishism led me to check out Knuckle Scraper, embarrassingly enough.
Knuckle Scraper was a fucking awesome 3-piece powerviolence machine from Houston, Texas (hence the skulls, I suppose) fresh from the ashes of yet-unheard-by-me Machine Gun Romantics. Like most bands of their stripe, they lasted for a depressingly short time, and only left about 10 or 15 minutes of tuneage in their wake. The awesomely titled Max Isn't The Bastard (presumably in reference to Max Ward of 625 Thrashcore) was their first 7", and manages to clock in 12 tracks at a stupidly brisk 5 minutes without becoming an unmemorable blur of blastbeats. This isn't to say the band aren't fast as fuck, as they pretty much switch exclusively between frenetic blasting and hardcore tempo, but the songwriting on here is really captivating regardless of the brevity. Actually, Knuckle Scraper, much like XBrainiaX and Sore Throat, is one of those bands notorious on last.fm for the inability to "scrobble" due to their penchant for songs under 30 seconds. Stylistically, the band's sound is relatively standard powerviolence fare, but again, the songwriting ability of the members is key to their appeal. That said, the sound itself comes across like a glorious hybrid of Crossed Out's balls-out aggression and speed and Spazz's idiosyncrasy, humor, and triple vocal assault.

http://www.mediafire.com/?zy2gjzzzdiw

This is great stuff, but it's unfortunately OOP as far as I can tell. I've heard both of their 7"s were compiled recently, including a few compilation tracks they did, but that may have just been a rumor. By the way, Knuckle Scraper gets listed in XBrainiaX's "M.S.M.P" (speaking of tributes) alongside The Endless Blockade, Warzone Womyn, Scapegoat, and some band called Born Backwards (presumably after that old Assuck EP). Does anyone know anything about them? Are they the equivalent of the non-existent Manpig listed in Man Is The Bastard's "H.S.M.P"?
WHO THE FUCK WAS MANPIG?

ACXDC - He Had It Coming

I'm on a "KUH-RAY-ZEE" powerviolence trip right now (as someone I would dislike might say) since I'm trying to slap together a nice lil' introductory zine. If you come here for the pop-punk, I apologize, but its delivery will be a bit diluted for the time being. Ha, what am I saying, you don't "come here".

I wonder how long it'll be before the intentional self-deprecating humor will be called out as narcissistic.

This might be one of the stupidest band names I've ever encountered or one of the gutsiest. ACXDC (aka Anti-Christ Demon-Core) are a 4-piece from Southern California who did an initial run from '03-'05, called it quits after a reunion show in '06, and then reformed in 2010 much to my loins' approval. Covering their first EP right after Neanderthal was kind of a last second decision, as I had originally intended to do the genre history lesson in semi-chronological order. Unfortunately, this here came up and changed my plans:

http://blogs.laweekly.com/westcoastsound/2012/02/powerviolence_acxdc_benefit_sh.php

So hey, it's topical AND heartrending. Of course, it should go without saying that ACXDC are a great band and the guilt trip I'm imploring you to land in is just circumstantial. Anywho, He Had It Coming is some super intense stuff, floating in the beautiful medium betwixt grindcore and powerviolence. For a glorious 10 minutes, you get mercilessly cockstomped by a wall of high velocity riffing, shrieking, and blasting. Does comparing the listening experience to genital mutilation make you want to listen to this? A lot of reviewers of this sort of music seem to think so, and I am incapable of differentiating myself from them. Bullshit aside, this is a ton of fun. The vocals are utterly unintelligible, inhuman shrieks punctuated tastefully with rumbling death/grind growls that fly at you near constantly ala Rupture. Musically, you get a surprisingly tight and well-produced blast of tight, varied drumming, riffs alternating between chaotic shredding and mid-t0-sludge paced interludes, and even a brief nod to Star Wars. It's the kind of shit best listened to in an empty bedroom without a lot of breakables for you to collide with.
This is currently OOP, but you can still support these guys with merch and whatnot. For example, I would buy the shit out of that skate deck with the Darth Vader heads if I could actually stand on a board without immediately concussing.

http://www.mediafire.com/?wqbv2lyfjki
http://acxdc.bigcartel.com/

As a totally irrelevant sidenote, Sylvester Staline is terrible. I just rediscovered this courtesy of youtube. I made the mistake of picking up their lame-as-fuck-but-amusingly-titled Gonna Spread Hard Drugs To Your Stupid Kids With The Royalties Generated By This CD album back in high school. This is the kind of shit people dismiss powerviolence over: sloppy playing, terrible vocals, and way too many lame inside jokes.
Oh, hey, and here's another pro-tip for starting a powerviolence group: don't name your band Duke Nukem Forever.

The Menzingers - Chamberlain Waits

Before I begin:
I'm turning this blog into a zine. It'll be a mash up of music reviews, my comics, personal/political pieces, assorted artwork, and New Yawk scene stuff. I'm also doing a zine covering the history of powerviolence, as well, consisting of interviews, a "best of" list with reviews, and other goodies. I have no idea when this will come to fruition, but you can count on the former seeing the light of day in the not so distant future.

Admittedly, it's been a long-ass time since I had any desire to give the The Menzingers' debut LP a listen. In fact, it wasn't long after completing last year's review that the album's luster wore off and it faded from my priorities list. I guess it would've made sense for me to have rectified this change of heart via an update or something, but well, it's a miracle that I write anything at all, sometimes. Fortunately, the same can't be said about their follow-up, Chamberlain Waits, as it has been percolating in my ears long enough that I feel confident in giving it props. You see, its actually a fantastic concept album detailing the fictional life of Tom Waits' older, seafaring brother, Chamberlain, as he comes to grips with his m,Kkgvd9u2

Ugh, I'm admittedly out of practice with this record review stuff.

Chamberlain Waits features a far more clean and dynamic sound than their debut, and features 10 great-to-fantastic tracks of heartfelt, melodic, folk-tinged "orgcore", and 2 comparative duds. This time around, the band put a greater focus on vocal melody and less on really dated sounding dual scream-singing, and it pays off in spades. If you don't have the right ear for it, I can see Tom May's emotive crooning coming across as a bit overstated at times, but for whatever reason, I love the shit out of even his more warbly moments. With hindsight given by a listen to their new single, I now hear this album as a vaguely transitional one. It seems like the band had grown a bit tired of the gruffer pop-punk sound of the debut and followup EP, and were just beginning to inject more aspects of indie-folk/alternative rock into their repertoire. The results are a fairly smooth mash up of the two halves, and I'd even rate the first 8 tracks here by the arbitrary and mindlessly personal scale of "almost perfect"... well, excepting that cheesy screaming section of "Home Outgrown". Holy dicks are "Times Tables" and "Male Call" great songs, though, both lyrically and musically. I'd hate to pull that boring-as-fuck "worth the price of admission alone" cliche here, but well, if you spank it to the altar of punk news idols, these are two tracks you'd be wise to track down. Okay, here's one:

In reference to a major flaw in the first disc, this one fortunately features no short fuses like "A Lesson In The Abuse Of Information Technology" and "Even For An Eggshell", both of which I listed as standouts in the previous review. Their appeal is about as short lived as how fast they get stuck in your head. There are really only two tracks I don't particularly care for here: "No We Didn't" sounds like that yucky opener on A Lesson... reduced to a more merciful brevity, and "Come Here Often?" is sort of marred by grating/dull vocal patterns. I suppose they're not unlistenable, though, and do in fact vary up the disc's prevailing mood... but so would covers of "ALL!" and "No, ALL!". Does that go without saying? I'm tired since I had to rewrite half this fucking review due to blogspot's inability to consistently save my progress.

Yes, that's why my writing sucks. Because of blogspot.

http://www.mediafire.com/?nk0uwjewzmj

So it seems like my opinion of this album is about the same as my initial thoughts regarding the debut - THIS TIME WITH MORE CONVICTION. Although, wouldn't it be just a chuckle riot if I totally denounced everything I said here in a future review of the band? Ho HO.

Neanderthal - Fighting Music

This will probably end up being a really short review since I'm still on the road, but well... I guess circumstances could be more inappropriate for a band whose discography clocks in at 10 minutes.

"Oh yeah, I'm traveling right now. I don't know if I mentioned that before, but its why I haven't updated lately. Expect more regular posts come mid-March!", he typed excitedly, unaware of the irrelevance of his words. It seemed the internet had turned its back on him a long time ago; like the light from a collapsed star, the dissolution of his audience would take a lifetime to become apparent.

Neanderthal's lone EP is the stuff of legends: incredibly influential, hopelessly un-dated, and incomprehensibly expensive on ebay. Consisting of a pre-Man Is The Bastard Eric Wood and Matt Domino of Infest, Neanderthal was an extremely short lived project that single handedly kicked off (and coined) powerviolence as a genre. At this point, Infest had existed for several years, and No Comment had already put out their first EP, Common Senseless, but this is really where it begins stylistically. As such, Fighting Music is about as pure as you're gonna get, and contains all the scuzz, filth, and heaviness the genre provided before the great emo/90's hardcore gentrification struck.
As the name might make you think, the sound this band produces is primitive, brutal, and mammoth spearing as fuck. Imagine the speed and tantrum-like, bellowing rage of Infest mashed up with creepy, Rorschach-esque riffs and the tremendous grit and intricate basslines of Man Is The Bastard. It's about as rad as that descriptor might lead you to believe, and fits snuggly alongside a number of EPs I've raved about in the past - a short, but really fulfilling listen.

http://www.mediafire.com/?ilzmnzu2mqt

I've never been able to confirm this, but I've heard that Joel Connell of MITB (then of Shrimper label weirdos, Refrigerator) was somehow involved with this band. Does anyone know if Neanderthal performed live shows? If they did, I gotta conclude that Joel filled in on either drums or guitar. Matt Domino is listed in the liner notes as handling both in this EP's liner notes, but I kinda doubt he was doing that Happy Flowers thing where he'd slide his foot around the strings while drumming.

Maybe that was too obscure of a reference.

Tuesday - Early Summer

This may be an instance where the hoary cliche "preaching to the choir" could rear it's boring head, but well, if you're not familiar with the branches of the Slapstick family tree, you'd be doing yourself a favor by taking a look at this. Personally, I don't hold it in the place of reverence that many people do, but there are certainly some goods to be had here. For instance, while Slapstick, The Broadways, and Alkaline Trio have always kicked my ass, The Lawrence Arms, The Falcon, and The Honor System are thoroughly, thoroughly underwhelming. Emphasis on the former, albeit that statement may come across as heresy; the way I see it, they started off as an inferior version of The Broadways and slowly made their way into a dull-as-shit, glossy alt-punk waste of time.
Less Than Jake and Tuesday fall somewhere between the two. Admittedly, and somewhat embarrassingly, I actually like the pre-'96 material of the former, and regarding the latter, I only have the EP in the top left corner to indulge in.
Tuesday formed in '96, shortly after Slapstick's dissolution, and were able to clamp their collective sphincters for only a year before releasing the godawful Freewheelin' LP in '97. While the Early Summer EP was 4 tracks of catchy, bass-y, hard-hitting pop-punk with the combined vocal front of future Alkaline Trio bassist Dan Andriano and drummer Rob Kellenberger, Freewheelin' sounded like the band spent the intermediate phase smoking weed and listening to stacks of surface-level Midwestern emo albums. And I don't mean that in the American Football way, either; the band essentially took their infectious style of old, sucked all the life out of it, and slathered it in melodramatic cheese. It's a mess measured by the meter stick of those horrible acoustic songs on Goddamnit if you know what I mean.
Giant globs of criticism aside, Early Summer is great as it's followup is disappointing. At the time, the band were a trio, and the songwriting style was decidedly more in the Crimpshrine/Jawbreaker vein than anything approaching 3rd wave emo. Despite that, the 4 songs here sound surprisingly strong and fresh, with solid guitar hooks and as much care put into the verses as the choruses. Dan Andriano's voice has a lot of bite to it here in comparison to all future ventures, and actually sounds like he belongs in a punk band, which plays especially well off of Kellenberger's cleaner harmonies. My favorite song off of here has to be the closer, "So Awake" (which was later re-recorded as the much weaker "Too Much Of Today" on Freewheelin'), but the preceding 3 are just as strong. Also, I'm pretty sure that's the last positive love song Andriano would ever write.

http://www.mediafire.com/?bkmyawhmkq2

This EPs out of print as fuck, but I'm pretty sure you can get it cheap on discogs.com and amazon. After all, pretty much no one knows/gives a shit about this band anymore. Oh, and while I can't confirm this, I heard that The Honor System's demo sets everyone up for disappointment just as bad as Early Summer. At least Andriano didn't postulate that more pro-tools vocal effects would be the key to the kingdom. What the fuck, Hanaway.

Alkaline Trio - Maybe I'll Catch Fire

This is probably the least musically relevant thing I've ever utilized as an introduction, but it's something that just now crept out from my periphery: have you noticed that, like, 70% of the female populace between the ages of 16 and 35 are clad in membrane-snug black tights? They're probably the most revealing garment I've ever seen achieve this kind of homogeneity, especially when worn as a pants-substitute. To clarify, I don't intend this as a blue-balled, prudish/misogynist jab at women, as I understand almost everyone, regardless of sex, is caught somewhere in the fashion undertow, but I can't help but raise an eyebrow at how widespread this shit is. It's like a nationwide showcase of ass at the molecular level.

Anyway, to start, the handful of somewhat ambiguous jabs I've penned about Alkaline Trio in the past still stand. They are, and probably always will be, complete cornballs of the "dark" and angst-laden persuasion with lyrics that curdle milk. In fact, I could probably lambaste them in the same light as The Gaslight Anthem, who I dissed several months ago for their similarly laughable (albeit totally different) lyricism. Just like the aforementioned band, though, I've gone through a cycle of acceptance with Alkaline Trio illustrated below:
1.) Infatuation
2.) Light criticism of thematic elements/lyrics
3.) Total disdain and/or embarrassment followed by abandonment
4.) Re-visitation and light criticism
5.) Love of the material with a tongue planted firmly in cheek
And yeah, Maybe I'll Catch Fire is an album I really love, regardless of how fucking silly and un-relateable the lyrics are. Alkaline Trio are one of the most well-known branches of the Slapstick family tree and are a (duh) trio comprised of Dan Adriano of Tuesday, Slapstick, and eventually The Falcon, Matt Skiba (who's also in the unheard-by-me band Heavens), and Derek Grant, previously of The Suicide Machines and a zillion other bands.
This album is their sophomore effort, and the follow-up to 1998's excellent debut (except the two putrid acoustic tracks), Goddamnit. I can't remember exactly, but I'm pretty sure this is the band's most popular album, if not just for the band's staple encore song, "Radio", but it's definitely mine. The songwriting here is really strong, and less raw and bass-y than their first album, with the general pace slowed down to allow the melodies to really develop. I wouldn't call this an indie rock album, exactly, as tracks like "5-3 10-4", "She Took Him To The Lake", and "Madam Me" truck it pretty hard, but there's a distinct adaptation of a more rock-esque format here. Unlike almost every pop-punk band of the past 10 years, the dual vocal approach is considerably reserved, which makes the harmonies stand out a lot, especially in "You Got So Far To Go", which is easily one the album's best tracks next to "5-3 10-4", the dark-warmth of "Sleepyhead", and the refreshingly non-accusatory "She Took Him To The Lake". The latter's got a pretty typical theme of heartbreak, but despite the male described being abandoned, blame never gets heaped on the girl for being a vicious heartstomping witch or whatever bullshit you'd find in virtually every Descendents song.

http://www.mediafire.com/?fmey4i4jyym

In conclusion, I'm tired of sitting at the computer writing this. Also, if you've got a bias against this band due to their cheesy, "gawthic" image or perceived "emo-ness", try to ignore the lyrics. The music itself, vocals included, make for a really great package, and even the imagery's pretty vivid and satisfying once you stop taking it seriously. I guess I should probably mention "Radio", though, since everyone loves that song: it's pretty good. Unfortunately, it also contains the line “shaking like a dog shitting razor blades".
Hm.

Mixtapes - Maps

What sucks is that I actually want to operate this blog again. Also, after about a year's hiatus, I've resumed creating autobiographical comics to publish on a blog or something in hopes of a.) getting my name out there so I may begin freelancing and b.) feeling a semblance of personal fulfillment by putting my artistic leanings to use again. What sucks (while simultaneously "rules") is the fact that these two prospects will fall by the wayside so shortly after reinvigoration, seeing as I'm going vagabonding again for several months and may or may not return in a mindset conducive to writing about this kind of music.

And furthermore, (paragraph of personal bullshit prone to putting off any passerby) HA HA SELF PARODY JDGSJHD

Mixtapes are a Cincinnati, Ohio 4-piece comprised of 3 hairy dudes and a girl with Romulan bangs that play a form of punk music that sidles between the worlds of pop-punk and indie-pop without ever really matching up with the current climate of either genre. Which is to say, there's no intentionally poor production values utilized as a garage band tribute, heavy, springboard basslines, or vocalists that could use a lozenge. Also, as far as I can tell, they came out of fucking nowhere, which is totally confounding if only because of how incredibly good they are. I know "good" is not the most professional or descriptive term, but when so many aspects of a band sound this polished and mature, it's hard not to reach for umbrella terms. I don't like to sink into the eye-rolling depths of hyperbole, but for a debut, this is a pretty much flawless release.
Maps is 10 songs in 18 minutes, and contained within that microscopic running time are enough instantly memorable hooks, melodies, sing-a-long-able vocal harmonies and lyrics than most bands can muster between several LPs. The songs are all super short ditties that alternate between anthems, speedy pop-punk, and pretty acoustic tracks with a crystal clear production that makes the consistent juggling of modes sound perfectly natural and seamless. I wouldn't say there are any tracks here that standout among the rest, but considering the circumstances, I couldn't give a better compliment; in essence, pretty much every track on here is not only cohesive with it's surroundings, but also feels perfectly suited to exist outside of context, say, within a sentimental CD-R or cassette compilation format. Fuck you, I refuse to make a joke about the band's name.
Oh, also, there's a minimalistic yet prevalent use of piano which suits their sound really well.

try it here: http://www.mediafire.com/?uq3w3v2b980998x
buy it here: http://animalstyle.limitedpressing.com/products/13339

The two vocalists' interactions are probably the biggest hook the band employ, though. The earnest, quasi-snotty voice of (male-bodied vocalist) and the smokey, pretty voice of (female-bodied vocalist) intermingle in such a way that the lyrics are constantly comprehensible despite the two's knack for harmonizing. It's kinda like The Anniversary were less putrid and keyboard heavy and more punk rawk. The lyrics might put some people off, as they straddle the line between awkward and self-righteous, but goddamn could I relate to this just a few years back. A running theme here is the comfort in being alone, not partying, and quiet aggrandizement relating to allegiance to the two aforementioned themes. I might be reading too much into the posturing behind their lyrics, but they sound exactly like something I would've written as a painfully self-aware, socially awkward, self-described intellectual who's internal deprecation was only transformed into defensive pride by the upstroke of mood swings.

I dunno.

I want there to be a song called "Watching Porn On A Library Computer". Do you think Dillinger Four would make that song if we got a petition going?